TextEtc Blog | - Part 10

Posted by Colin Holcombe on 10 12 14

Stanza Shaping in Horace

Contemporary styles notwithstanding, translators have generally grouped Horace’s Odes in four-line stanzas to reflect the continuity of content and the Latin measures, a practice often called Meineke’s Law after their originator. A few translators have gone further and devised individual stanza shapes to represent the Latin measures, the best known of whom may be John Conington. {1} It’s an approach that works happily enough in the lighter pieces, as in I 26: The Muses love me: fear and grief, The winds may blow them to the sea; Who quail before the wintry chief Of Scythian real, is nought to me. But comes to grief in the more demanding odes packed with detail, as here in IV 14 (16-20), using a 4 4 4 4 stanza shape spectandus in certamine Martio, deuota morti pectora liberae quanti fatigaret ruinis, indomitas prope qualis undas in the Alciac strophe: x – u – – / – u u – u – x x – u – – / – u u – u – x x – u – – – u – x – u u – u u – u – x Conington: ‘Twas then the elder Nero came To conflict, and in ruin roll’d Stout Raetian kernes of giant frame. O, ’twas a gallant sight to see The shocks that beat upon the brave That’s an heroic attempt, but the rhymes are contrived, and the content seriously trivialized. In contrast, it seems better to use an ampler (5 5 5 4) stanza shape throughout for the Alcaic strophe: In turn the elder Nero entered on the fight and, with the favoring omens plain to all, defeated and so put to headlong flight the hordes of Rhaetians. That vast fall received its rapturous approbation when he daunted minds, exhausting combatants {2} Housman But do we need to be so restrictive in stanza shaping? It’s certainly a way of giving variety to the Odes, and to some extent escaping the usual complaint, that Horace has once again been rendered as anodyne English verse. One of the problems with the McClatchy collection {3} is the absence of proper shaping to the translations: they are generally too loose to be effective verse. Nonetheless, Housman {4} in his celebrated translation of IV 7 ignored such matters, and used quatrains throughout for this (Second Archilochean) strophe: – u u – u u – / u u – u u – u u –...

Posted by Colin Holcombe on 21 11 14

Versions of Horace 3

This is the third and concluding post comparing translations of Horace Odes. Carmen One 28 Measure: First Archilochean: – u u – u u – / u u – u u – u u – x – u u – u u – u u – x Theme: Death comes to all. Latin and word-for-word translation: Te maris et terrae numeroque carentis harenae mensorem cohibent, Archyta, pulueris exigui prope latum parua Matinum munera nec quicquam tibi prodest aerias temptasse domos animoque rotundum percurrisse polum morituro. Occidit et Pelopis genitor, conuiua deorum, Tithonusque remotus in auras You, sea and earth and numberless sand surveyor confines you, Archytas, small dust near unimportant shore of Matinium offer nor are you worth round sky home and spirit scan sky you will die. Died and Pelop’s father, guest of gods Tithonus drawn into air John Conington The sea, the earth, the innumerable sand, Archytas, thou couldst measure; now, alas! A little dust on Matine shore has spann’d That soaring spirit; vain it was to pass The gates of heaven, and send thy soul in quest O’er air’s wide realms; for though hadst yet to die. Aye, dead is Pelop’s father’s heaven’s own guest, And old Tithonus, rapt from earth to sky Here the longer lines have allowed Conington to make more of the verse, and the rendering is faithful to the original in content and tone, though now very dated in its diction. Edward Marsh 1941 Archytas meted with his wand the bounds of earth and sea, Or weighed the unnumbered sand; and by a little meed of dust Cribbed on the Matine shore he lies, not aught avails him now The airy citadels to have scaled, and the convex of heaven Visited with a mind that all the while was doomed to die. Death found Tithonus, hidden in the secret courts of Dawn, And Minos, whom all-ruling Jove to his deep counsels called, And Tantalus, who supped with gods. Again not one of Marsh’s best. The piece has been recast in a style that even then was rather old-fashioned, and various poeticisms added to give the rapture of inspiration to the lines: ‘meed of dust’, ‘not aught avails him now’, ‘airy citadels’, ‘doomed to die’, ‘supped with gods’. Today we’d probably think the poem would be stronger without such aids. The content is padded out but essentially faithful: even ‘meted with his wand’ could conceivably serve for mensorem. David Mulroy 1994 A mound...

Posted by Colin Holcombe on 18 11 14

Versions of Horace 2

This is the second post comparing translations of Horace odes, and here we look at Book One Carmen 5. It’s in the Fourth Asclepiadean, which runs: – – – u u – / – u u – u x – – – u u – / – u u – u x – – – u u – x – – – u u – u – The third line pulls the movement up short, often giving it emphasis or special focus. The Latin and word-for-word translation are: Quis multa gracilis te puer in rosa perfusus liquidis urget odoribus grato, Pyrrha, sub antro? cui flauam religas comam, simplex munditiis? Heu quotiens fidem 5 mutatosque deos flebit et aspera nigris aequora uentis emirabitur insolens, Who much slender you boy on rose bathing liquid squeezing with scent pleasing, Pyrrha, under cave who yellow tie hair, Simple appearance? Alas how often faith changing gods will weep and fierce black sea surface winds will be wondering at arrogant John Conington What slender youth, besprinkled with perfume, Courts you on roses in some grotto’s shade? Fair Pyrrha, say for whom Your yellow hair you braid, So trim, so simple! Ah! How oft shall he Lament that faith can change, Viewing the rough black sea With eyes to tempests strange. The previous Conington comments apply to this translation, where the translation’s even shorter lines (to echo the Latin form) allow none of that ‘incommunicable grace of expression’ (to quote Conington’s own words in his Preface). Lines as short as these are difficult to handle, of course, or, to put the matter more exactly, the rhyme needs have to be met at the expense of the verse quality, something that Conington was well aware of when he noted ‘believing rhyme to be the inferior artist’s only chance of giving pleasure.’ Beyond that, the rendering is again close, though a little congested, but the tone is still appropriate. Edward Marsh 1941 Pyrrha, what essenced youth with ardours bold Pursues thee now? For whom has spread In thy delicious bower a roseleaf bed, And wrought upon thy lovely head That easy miracle of curling gold? Alas, how soon the hapless youth shall rue Thy broken faith, the kindly gods gone cold, And with amazement wake up to view Black sudden winds lash up the seas. Marsh’s translation has gone back to Augustan poetry with ‘what essenced youth with ardours bold’ and then gilded the lily with ‘delicious’, ‘lovely’,...

Posted by Colin Holcombe on 15 11 14

Versions of Horace 1

I was once asked if it could be ‘fair’ to look at other translations before beginning one’s own work. Not only fair, was my reply, but essential, and not simply to glance at previous versions but study them carefully. Translation is not a competition, but a fraternity of interests where each practitioner learns from others, as happens in all the sensible professions. Originality can be overdone, and in a world awash with translations what is often needed is a wise eclecticism that recasts previous attempts in the crucible of imagination and proper understanding of poet and period. Many authors are now adequately translated, and further efforts, unless they most significantly improve on their forebears, are a waste of everyone’s time. 1. OVERVIEW The qualities that make the Odes of Horace worth attention are by their nature difficult to translate for a contemporary poetry audience. In this brief analysis of selected poems in eight books of translations: John Conington 1863 {1} Edward Marsh 1941 {2} James Michie 1963 {3} David Mulroy 1994 {4} J.D. McClatchy (ed.) 2002 {5} Tony Kline 2003 {6} P.E. Knox and J.C. McKeown (eds.) 2013 {7} Colin Holcombe 2014 {8} I look at matters critically from six viewpoints: 1. Fidelity to the Latin, 2. Attitude to reader: tone, 3. Stanza shaping, 4. Verse texture, 5. Aesthetic qualities, and 6. Accessibility to a modern audience Being an inflected language, Latin allowed skilful poets to create concise beauties of phrasing well-nigh impossible to replicate in English. The Odes of Horace range from public utterances in the grand manner to songs and pleasing trifles, moreover, which in turn call for an unusually lapidary translation style. Roman poetry also had different aims to our serious poetry today, which adds another layer of difficulty. I will develop these points briefly as the analysis and comparison proceeds on three odes, chosen because they are characteristic and important examples of Horace’s art, and because the translations are (largely) freely available over the Internet. These eight can only be small sample, as complete renderings of the Odes into English exceeded a hundred even fifty years ago, and there have been many since, in free and strict verse forms. 2. COMPARISONS Book Two, Carmen 2 This is the first ode in one of Horace’s favourite measures, the Sapphic, which runs: – u – – – / u u – u – u x – u – – – / u u – u – u ...

Posted by Colin Holcombe on 16 03 14

Translating Dante’s Terza Rima: Second Post

We can use unrhymed tetrameters in place of Dante’s terza rima to capture the sinewy strength of narrative in the Divine Comedy.

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